Dear Diary,

BETWEEN THEM
Part 40

I met her.....
A real beautiful day.... Something that I will carry on with me....

Maybe I should leave it at that.... And move on....
Not hurt her anymore....

It makes me wonder if by being there I give her more pain than by being absent from her life....
And I don't have the guts to ask her the answer.... yet....

It was a simple thing... She was there to donate blood.... I am sure that she would have been fine had she not come across me....
Stupid me actually. I really couldn't pass by her without speaking to her.... It was all I was waiting for anyway... all these days.... you know.....

Just like that... I unnerved her... She seemed damn scared.... and nervous... of me....

That is what makes me wonder... She hasn't changed a bit....


And she has a secret.... That scared me....

The photo... I rather liked myself in it.... Nice snap....

And it is me.... Just me whom she likes... even now... almost a decade later....

No one else..... And I haven't seen another girl who would be this scared to face the one she likes.... Every one else would be only too excited....

Maybe thats what makes Shriya special.... When I see her get that nervous, the pain of her not trusting me enough, makes me wince within....

And today I couldn't help notice the fear in her eyes... And also the smile in them...

I just hope she isn't as confused of her feelings as I am.....

Too many times today I wanted to take hold of her.... And tell her that everything was fine... more fine then she thought.... that I too loved her....

It shocks me too.... Maybe I shouldn't tell her.... Maybe I should wait a bit... Till she really gets used to me....

But, I don't want to meet her next time unless am sure that she will be fine at the end of the day....

Not like what was today.... I know she could have been pretty fine without me.... I messed it up.....

And she lives alone... I had this urge tonight that I should maybe go over to her place and see that she is all fine.... But I know that it is silly... really....

I love her...

She has changed me in ways that I can't fathom.... Changed me without even being there in real...

Someday I will tell her that I always knew that I had met her before... And ask her when....

A long time before........



Goodnight.... I just hope I have no dreams tonight..... Anything else that jabs me and I will be finding myself ringing her doorbell in the dead of the night....

Krish